What am I like..

I was thinking about making my blog private.. But then again I thought that its kinda redundant.. Noone blog anymore nowadays..So that means nobody will actually go and check people's blog.. Since I dun have readers coming here, so whats the point of making it private.. I shall just say whatever I want then..:)

This past month had been one I can say I dun wanna live in.. I went through them but I dun like it the slightest bit. No.. Its not work this time.. I am just having a hard time with everything and everybody. I dun really know why.. Haiz.. I am sick and tired of all this drama.. heartache.. All these nonsense..

I seem to feel so insignificant on the face of Earth.. I dun feel special.. I dun feel that I make any difference to anybody's life.. I am just another normal girl going through the hardship of life.. Yea.. I am nothing much to anyone.. I am just doing everyone a/the favour. Its ok..

Its really sad.. Really.. And as I write down today's entry in this blog( that never fail me), I cry.. Not because I am insignificant.. But because I am tired..

I have been thinking alot these few days.. I may be smiling all the time but who actually know what I feel. I dun expect anybody to understand me anyway.. I was just wondering about everything that has happened to me all this while.. Did I do the right thing? Did I make the right decision? If I am doing the right thing then why is it that I feel so tired from all these dramas? Why is it that I never liked the trouble and pain it cause..

I dun wanna do or think anything that might be bad for me at the end.. I dun wanna hurt myself even deeper. I know how it feels like.

The future seems brighter but I dun quite know for sure.  I wanna go ahead and finish my studies before I decide on anything.. I wanna be successful before anything.. haiz.. I dunno.. Somehow, deep down, I am kinda dead!