*

Again and again I tell myself to be smart about things and never get my heart broken again.

No, its not that kind of broken, it is just painful and disappointment knowing that no one cares.

It is either I am just stupid before this and this have just stayed as a long service tenant in my life or the existence of a guy I truly love block all sanity and brain power to be thinking and acting smart.
I was often made felt like I am useless, stupid and needy and I truly need this to stop.

How exactly?

Stop loving and caring so much is certainly not an option. I was made that way and will never be able to change how I behave. Things are not right and certainly not great. I want to do something about it but urgh! I dunno what

Mungkin betol la... Jadi bodoh akhirnye